Everyone Needs a Coach

The Peter Principle states that we’re all susceptible to the inevitable fate of failing to meet the high expectations of our organizations and those expectations we put on ourselves. As we rise in all areas of our lives, we enter new territory that will require skills and/or experiences we may not possess. As Marshall Goldsmith so eloquently put it, “what got you here, won’t get you there.”

Aiming for the next rung of any ladder in our sights requires considering how we will condition ourselves for that journey. I’ve yet to hear any gold medal athlete brag that they trained themselves. Homage is always paid to the coach who was charged with laying down the work plan that would allow them to increase their skills and acknowledge and work around their weaknesses in order to achieve their best. Getting to gold medal status in our business and personal lives requires similar effort. A guided plan paired with constructive and instructive encouragement from a coach.

According to the International Coach Federation, the worldwide revenue produced by coaching is $1.5 billion (USD) per year and growing. It seems the word is out on the value coaching can bring to our personal and professional lives, so the next question is: How do you select the coach that has the right qualifications to get you from here to there? Here’s the thought process that could get you a win along with some personal insights from my recent selection of the coach pushing me through my wins.

It all boils down to relationships: Rapport is probably the most important factor to effective coaching. Next to the relationship with your significant other and certain family members, this is going to be the most intimate relationship in your life. If you can’t see yourself getting vulnerable with this person, think twice. Do your due diligence and interview more than one person. As you do, pay attention to the following in your initial contact and decision making phase. How are their interpersonal skills upon first contact? What does your gut instinct about this person tell you?  How are their verbal and nonverbal cues matching up? Are they listening to you? Do you feel accepted in their presence? How vulnerable are they with you? Do you have similar value sets?

I didn’t even know I was looking for my coach Doc Barham. We were connected through social arbitrage by a mutual friend who thought we should know each other. After our first interaction, I remember thinking, I like the way he thinks. When he invited me to an initial discovery session a couple of months later, we very easily shared conversation and hit on common values, passion points, and mutual interests. By the end of the hour, I knew without a doubt that this was the guy to guide my journey. Continue reading

7 Ways to Develop Employees into Digital Storytellers to Boost Their Skills AND Your Company’s Resources

Guest post by Halelly Azulay, TalentGrow

Developing motivated, competent employees is critical to the success of every organization. However, most managers today find themselves both time-bound and budget-strapped. You can’t really send employees to training or online classes for every development need. Did you know that organic development opportunities can be found all around your workplace?

One creative and immediately available way to develop your staff outside the training classroom and “outside the box” is to turn them into what I call “Digital Storytellers”: send them on roving reporter missions. Let them digitally capture (by audio or video recording) hot stories from the frontlines, from customers, or from star performers, about difficult challenges they’ve overcome, or about workarounds and new ideas, and share them with the rest of the organization.

Here are a few ideas for content to get you started:

  1. Peer Stories. Peers feature their peers’ stories of success, lessons learned, problems solved, questions and challenges they want input about, gratitude, quandaries, and other “teachable moments.” Continue reading

Win a Year of myGreenlight – Scholarship Contest

We want everyone to have access to amazing relational capital, so today we kick off our second scholarship contest. The winner will receive a FREE one-year unlimited membership to myGreenlight.

This prize, worth $699 (!), includes unlimited access to all of myGreenlight’s resources.

  • 3-course core curriculum
  • Field-tested Relationship Action Planning tool
  • 15+ hours of webinars and masterclasses, on everything from presentation skills to body language to social media branding
  • Multimedia Coaching Resource Center
  • Hundreds of samples, templates, and articles on-demand
  • Weekly newsletter to help sustain progress
  • Monthly live Social Capitalist Event with leading business thought leaders
  • Access to our alumni directory
  • Moderated community forums
  • Lifeline Group Recruiting and Accountability tool
PLUS the winner will receive all 3 of our Kickstart Bonus Courses
  • Five Steps to Relational Capital that Closes the Deal
  • Career Advancement: Optimize Your LinkedIn Profile
  • Entrepreneur’s Launch Kit

Each BONUS package includes an easy-to-implement action sequence with myGreenlight support materials – rocket fuel as you build your tailored network to make your dreams reality.

To win – submit your entry in the comments below. Tell us about your biggest relationship or networking-related challenge and what you will achieve with the relationship skills you develop during the course. The most compelling response (as judged by Community Manager Kibibi Springs and Program Director Sara Grace) will receive the scholarship.

What would YOU do if you could build the relationships that wouldn’t let you fail?  Tell us!

Entries must be received by April 6th at 5PM Eastern Time.  Good luck!

For more information about myGreenlight, including access to our Spring Special deal ($200 off of the regular price) - click here.  If you enroll and then win the scholarship, your tuition will be refunded in full – so don’t wait!

Guest Blog: How a Purpose Coach uses myGreenlight’s Model of Trust to Grow His Network

Howard Crampton, Jr., one of our earliest myGreenlight members, is a passionate life coach and mentor who helps people identify and develop their life purpose.

My introduction to the myGreenlight program was definitely in alignment with my purpose. It has helped me increase my network from 25 people (when I first began), to over 2,000+ people (not including my Facebook friends)!

My network continues to grow week by week, and I owe that in large part to the model of trust I learned through the myGreenlight Program. This model consists of the four mindsets of generosity, intimacy, candor, and accountability and it allows me to connect with people to add value to many lives and grow my business.

Generosity is my weapon of choice in a room full of 30-200+ persons. The ability to leave a strong impression on the people I meet is facilitated best by leading with generosity. People love to talk about themselves and when you practice active listening, not only does the individual get to talk about his- or herself, but you have an opportunity to listen for key factors (e.g. challenges, target audience, etc.) and find an opportunity to become generous and purposeful with offers of your service or product specific to the information you just obtained from this person. Continue reading

Identify and Uplevel Your Social Identity

This week’s Social Capitalist Tip is from Master Certified Coach Leah Grant, who serves as a myGreenlight coach.

Social Identity is how well you are known and how you are seen by others. Social identity is important because it is about who you are with people.

When being considered for promotions and projects technical excellence is only one piece of what’s being considered — the other component is your social identity.

After working with hundreds of professionals in the myGreenlight program, I have recognized three main types of social identity:

  1. The Recluse — This person keeps their head down, is technically skilled and does great work. They only reach out to those people they must have contact with to complete a project. When they communicate they stay away from all personal subjects. The Recluse may get put on teams for their abilities, but they are often passed up for promotions and really great projects because no one knows who they are and they haven’t taken the time to get to know anyone else. Continue reading

Do You Have What It Takes To Win? On the Next Social Capitalist, Mental Toughness Training from a Navy Seal

Prepare to break the ceiling on your professional goals using the mental and physical Mark Divinestrategies and tactics of the U.S. Navy Seals.

Join us Wednesday, March 28th at 12pm ET for our next Social Capitalist Live Event with Mark Divine, CEO of SEALFIT, NavySEALs.com, and US Cross Fit.

–> Click here to register!

Mark is the leader in providing civilians with mental toughness training and Navy Seal fitness. His insights into elite fitness, elite teams, leadership, mental toughness, and warrior spirit development were developed over his 20 years as a SEAL and business leader, 25 years as a martial artist, and 15 years as yoga practitioner. Mark is also a former adjunct professor of leadership at the University of San Diego, and a co-founder of the Coronado Brewing Co.

From Mark, you’ll learn how to:

  • Fine tune teamwork and accountability to drive excellence
  • Forge the mental toughness that creates strong presence and leadership
  • Maintain your “positive charge” – not just emotionally, but physically
  • Develop your inner Corporate Warrior to excel in all areas of your life

To Learn More:

Learn more about Sealfit: http://www.sealfit.com/about-us/news/
See the program in action: http://www.nbcsandiego.com/on-air/as-seen-on/Hell_Week_Boot_Camp_San_Diego-130847008.html

I hope you’ll join us Wednesday, March 28th at Noon ET for what’s sure to be an energizing discussion.

Again, here’s the link for registration.

Mark Magnacca Shares the Two Questions that Tell You Everything

Check out an excerpt from the transcript for The Social Capitalist interview featuring Mark Magnacca. Check out Tahl Raz’s post on the interview here. You can access the audio recording here. Here’s the full transcript: Social Capitalist Transcript – Mark Magnacca. Enjoy!

Mark Magnacca:    The set-up of this story of these two questions is from the meeting that Ronald Reagan had in Geneva, 1985 with the then Soviet Premier Gorbachev and one of the ideas inherent in this is understanding timing and having an actor sense of timing of being able to deliver the right question in the right way at the right time.  So, Reagan sitting in this meeting, it was a historic meeting, the first time they’ve ever met and as you may recall at that time, United States had more than twenty five thousand nuclear warhead pointed basically at the Soviet Union, they had an equivalent number pointed at us and Reagan was there and he discovered in his own mind, that for him to walk out of that meeting with the 10% reduction in nuclear weapons was a complete fraud because whether we could blow the world up about 10 times over or 9 times over, it really didn’t make any difference.  So, the certain point in the meeting Tahl, he looks at Gorbachev and he says, “how would you like to take a little walk with me outside and get some fresh air.”  That’s not an accidental question.  That was a pre-meditated question and within an instance, Ronald Reagan was on a video, one of the final videos on 60 minutes telling the story he says, “in a second, Gorbachev jumps up and says, “da” and out they go with Gorbachev’s translator, they walked down to a little cottage which Reagan had the fire burning and he had had warmed up and everything and he sits down and he says to Gorbachev, he says, “Mr. Gorbachev, we’re not armed, we’re not armed because we don’t distrust each other because we’re armed, we’re armed because we distrust each other.”  He said, “why don’t you and I spend a little time now to get to know each other and see if we can work out that issue of mistrust.”  In 60 minutes of them talking, they start walking back up and Reagan had another question, he says on the way back to the meeting with all the diplomats which they left alone, he says to Gorbachev, “why don’t we agree that we will have a summit in the United States next year and I’m inviting you to come,” and Gorbachev says, “I accept,” and then Gorbachev asked similar question, he says, “why don’t we agree that the following year the Summit will be in the Soviet Union.”  These two men walked back into the room, the diplomats had made no progress whatsoever and Reagan announces that these two guys have just agreed to do two Summits of the next two years.  It all changed because of the questions, so to bring that down to from geopolitical level to the person listening.   Here are two questions that you can ask in the spirit of Reagan’s questions.  The first question, you have to practice saying it and write it down preferably would be this: I would say to you Tahl, Tahl what do you see as the biggest opportunity to grow your business over the next 12 months, and then I would pause.

Tahl Raz:    Let me answer your question before that.  Do you think most people have a, most customers you dealt with have articulate answers for that? Continue reading

Legendary Networker – Heidi Roizen

Check out an excerpt from the transcript for The Social Capitalist interview featuring Heidi Roizen. Click here for the full transcript: Social Capitalist Transcript – Heidi Roizen. Access the audio recording here. Enjoy!

Tahl Raz:     So what are the big a-has and takeaway for people?  What lessons, both general ideas and concrete strategies, have proven over the years to deliver the most value and create the most change for other people?

Heidi Roizen:     I think that, first of all, just being given some guidelines and being told that you don’t have to be a natural.  That everyone can develop these things gives people some belief in their ability to go out and do things.  And I’m a big believer in, you know, the first step is you got to believe you can go make a change and you can make something happen.  I think the idea also that everyone has something to give.  What do you possibly have to give to someone else?  And by the way, the fundamental approach for me, if you want to boil this case down to one thing to takeaway, it’s don’t approach someone because you want something from them.  Approach someone because you have something to offer.  Now there’s no reason that offer can’t be a win-win for you as well.  But think in terms of what value are you bringing to other people because ultimately, that’s why they’re going to continue to connect with you and they’re going to answer your phone calls and your e-mails and your whatever, is because they see you as someone who can be helpful to them.  And I think that’s a very easy thing to learn, right?  And that’s a very easy thing to test and check as you go out and prosecute your life is when you go out and intend to form a relationship with someone, the first thing you should think is, what value am I to them? Continue reading

The Science of Success

Check out an excerpt from the transcript for The Social Capitalist interview featuring Heidi Grant Halvorson. Read Tahl’s Raz’s blog post on the interview here. Click here for the full transcript: Social Capitalist Transcript – Heidi Grant Halvorson. Please access the audio recording here. Enjoy!

Tahl Raz:    So the application of all of these new – and when I say “new”, the last 30 years of social science’s focus on, as you say, the science of success or achievement – you said something incredibly provocative, I thought, that you make suggestions in your book and that you have implied that you have the answer.  But what are the best goals to pursue – as in, what goals kind of create the most well-being, the most fulfillment, the most – I think you said authenticity – what are those best goals?

Heidi G. Halvorson:    Well, again, they have to do with – I mean, it’s a broad class of goals.  So it’s not that there are three very specific things you need to do.  But it all comes down to why you’re pursuing the goals that you are pursuing.  So if you are trying to, for example, get ahead at work, which many of us are – you know, kind of climb the ladder – are you doing it because you find it personally challenging and rewarding, or are you doing it in order to, for example, seek the approval of other people?  So often it’s not about necessarily what the goal is on the surface, but really the why that matters.  And when we choose goals in our lives that satisfy our basic human needs – people have been arguing for thousands of years about what human beings really need in life.  And really the consensus in psychology has kind of focused on three in particular.  We talk about the need – for anything to be universal cross-culturally – the need for belonging.  So people have this basic need to relate to other people and to be part of meaningful groups, to contribute to their communities.  Another need is the need for what psychologists call competence.  And that has to do with sort of growing our abilities, working on new skills, acquiring knowledge, being able to sort of impact your environment in meaningful ways.  And then the third basic human need has to do with the sense that psychologists call autonomy, the idea that we do things because we are intrinsically motivated to do them, because they reflect something about our values, who we are as unique individuals.  So really it’s the why that matters.  Why are you deciding to go to medical school?  Why are you doing what you’re doing at work?  Why are you in a particular relationship?  And if it’s to satisfy these basic needs, then if you are successful, that’s going to bring you that kind of authentic lasting happiness that many of us associate with being truly successful.  It’s when our actions and our goals are motivated by things outside ourselves, by the approval of others, by seeking things like power and fame for their own sake, rather than to use them to do something positive, those kinds of goals can make us happy – I mean, certainly when you have reached a goal you’re going to feel some happiness.  The question is whether or not that happiness is fleeting. And it your goals really satisfy these basic human needs that we all seem to have, relatedness, competence, and autonomy, then that happiness is going to be a more lasting deeper happiness than you would have otherwise.  I mean, achieving goals is always a good thing.  But when we pursue things that really satisfy us as human beings, then you’re going to have another kind, another level of happiness than you would otherwise have. Continue reading