Relationship Roundup

This week in the roundup, career advice for maintaining balance and being an accountable leader. Plus, a real life example of networking’s importance to your success and using social media to generate generosity.

Healthy career advice – Sales expert Geoffrey James offers great advice for managing your career to maintain your sanity. Read Geoffrey’s Inc. blog here: http://bit.ly/MMSxOS.

Calling all aspiring leaders – Futurist Edie Weiner offers insight on the role that wisdom vs. intellect plays in the success of future leaders. View Edie’s Big Think video here: http://bit.ly/M3xVPM.

Networking for a win – Networking took center stage on the latest episode of TechStars where entrepreneurs aspiring to win the big prize had to network their way to a win. View the episode here: http://bit.ly/OB04zq.

Oh what a wonderful world – Author of Culturematic, Grant McCracken, investigates the possibility of a utopian world where kindness reins in even the most unfriendly civil landscapes. Read Grant’s HBR blog researching social media designed to generate generosity here: http://bit.ly/K26CmZ.

Accountability is key – Three simple words can build trust with employees. No, it’s not “I trust you”.  “I was wrong,” shows self-accountability and reinforces your character as a leader. View the Smartbrief blog from internationally known leadership expert, John Baldoni here: http://bit.ly/KUSAtz.

Kibibi Springs is myGreenlight’s Community Director.

Contact Management Tool Review: Contactually

As you may know, I’m working my way through trying out all the new smart contact managers. As someone who is considering a client services business (more on that soon!) the need to button up the data management side of my network and relationships is becoming ever more pressing.

This week’s trial: Contactually, recommended to me by Get Storied’s Michael Margolis.

Contactually immediately made me happy with two features I’ve been looking for and haven’t found elsewhere:

  • pinging reminders based on groups (‘buckets’)
  • drag-and-drop contacts to groups

I wish you could put someone into more than two buckets, although Michael immediately had this counterargument when I complained: It can be good to be forced to keep things simple. Still, I really enjoy the easy and flexible tagging system in the competitor product Connected. Something about their UI makes everything feel so organized and easy. Contactually does more, which is theoretically good, but it makes the dashboard there a lot more cluttered. Continue reading

The Workplace Drone and How to Silence It

Your work environment can have a profound impact on your workday and the quality of your work. The current trend is to steer away from isolation, making offices tear down the walls, both literal and figurative. The problem is, it’s hard to concentrate when you can constantly hear the conversations of your coworkers. A recent New York Times article sheds some light on this particular issue.

To some people, it is very difficult to work through the constant chatter that comes with an office space. So if there are no walls, we make our own. Headphones. Giant filing cabinets. Books. You name it, we do it.  “After surveying 65,000 people over the past decade in North America, Europe, Africa and Australia, researchers at the University of California, Berkeley, report that more than half of office workers are dissatisfied with the level of ‘speech privacy,’ making it the leading complaint in offices everywhere,” according to the Times. Continue reading

Joe Navarro: Building Harmony Through Seating Arrangements

As one of the original founding members of the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Program, Joe Navarro mastered the ability to read nonverbal body language. When he retired in 2003, he discovered his expertise and skills could be taught, to benefit everyone from professional poker players to executives who wanted an extra edge. Since then, he has authored numerous books, including the classic What Every BODY Is Saying.

When Navarro sat down with Tahl Raz, co-author of Never Eat Alone, he shared some insider observations about where and how to stand to appear less threatening.

Walk up to somebody and stand right in front of them. If we were to put meters on you, we would see that your blood pressure goes up – and yet we know that if you were to stand at an angle to that person, your blood pressure would go down and you’d actually feel better about talking to this person. So, the angle is important to helping someone relax.
Continue reading

Relationship Roundup

Repeat after me, “perception is reality, perception is reality, perception is reality.” That’s the theme of this week’s roundup, along with some business hacks to assist your sanity, and productivity as we race to close Q3.

Perception management tips from royalty – Perception is reality and when leading any charge, critical to success. Scott Elbin’s blog details the superior perception management skills of the Windsor’s and how we can use their strategies to manage our day-to-day reality. Read Scott’s blog here: http://bit.ly/LvEPyP.

Managing internal relationships – When you manage people the buck inevitably stops with you. However the image you project and the relationship you build with your workers will equate to the quality of work you receive from the team. Author of What Great Bosses Know, Jill Geisler, shares how to build quality relationships. Read her Poynter.org blog here: http://bit.ly/KKI4En.

Relationship mastery – The basis of relationship mastery is the foundation for superior interpersonal skills. How these elements align to leadership excellence is explored in this Smart Brief Blog on Leadership. Read it here: http://bit.ly/LvSBS2.

Time hacks for managers – Getting straight to the point. Read this to save more of your precious time: http://cbsn.ws/Mj9oZs.

Productivity booster – MyGreenlighters are constantly asking for productivity advice. Try this system for managing the interruptions that throw productivity off course. View author and productivity expert David Allen’s strategy here: http://cbsn.ws/L6269l.

Kibibi Springs is myGreenlight’s Community Director.

Next Week: Keith Ferrazzi and LinkedIn Founder Reid Hoffman LIVE

On Tuesday, June 12 at 12:30pm ET, join Keith Ferrazzi, CEO of Ferrazzi Greenlight, in conversation with Reid Hoffman, founder of LinkedIn and author of The Start-up of You: Adapt to the Future, Invest in Yourself, and Transform Your Career, at this month’s Social Capitalist Live Event.

Register here for the live Webex event!

During the lively, 45-minute discussion with audience Q&A, you’ll learn:

  • The backstory: how and why Reid launched LinkedIn
  • How thinking like a Silicon Valley entrepreneur enhances success in any career
  • How Reid personally leverages his LinkedIn page
  • The keys to maximizing your network literacy, the ability to conceptualize, access, and benefit from the information flowing through your social network

…And much, much more! If you can’t make it, register anyway – we’ll send you a recording and transcript afterwards.

What people are saying about The Start-up of You:

“The Internet has fundamentally changed the architecture of business and society. This terrific book shows you how to live, learn, and thrive in a networked world.”

“Crammed with insights and strategies to help each of us create the work life we want.”

“…start with an idea and work over your entire career to adapt it into something remarkable. This book distills the key techniques needed to succeed.”

See you there!

Everyone Needs a Coach

The Peter Principle states that we’re all susceptible to the inevitable fate of failing to meet the high expectations of our organizations and those expectations we put on ourselves. As we rise in all areas of our lives, we enter new territory that will require skills and/or experiences we may not possess. As Marshall Goldsmith so eloquently put it, “what got you here, won’t get you there.”

Aiming for the next rung of any ladder in our sights requires considering how we will condition ourselves for that journey. I’ve yet to hear any gold medal athlete brag that they trained themselves. Homage is always paid to the coach who was charged with laying down the work plan that would allow them to increase their skills and acknowledge and work around their weaknesses in order to achieve their best. Getting to gold medal status in our business and personal lives requires similar effort. A guided plan paired with constructive and instructive encouragement from a coach.

According to the International Coach Federation, the worldwide revenue produced by coaching is $1.5 billion (USD) per year and growing. It seems the word is out on the value coaching can bring to our personal and professional lives, so the next question is: How do you select the coach that has the right qualifications to get you from here to there? Here’s the thought process that could get you a win along with some personal insights from my recent selection of the coach pushing me through my wins.

It all boils down to relationships: Rapport is probably the most important factor to effective coaching. Next to the relationship with your significant other and certain family members, this is going to be the most intimate relationship in your life. If you can’t see yourself getting vulnerable with this person, think twice. Do your due diligence and interview more than one person. As you do, pay attention to the following in your initial contact and decision making phase. How are their interpersonal skills upon first contact? What does your gut instinct about this person tell you?  How are their verbal and nonverbal cues matching up? Are they listening to you? Do you feel accepted in their presence? How vulnerable are they with you? Do you have similar value sets?

I didn’t even know I was looking for my coach Doc Barham. We were connected through social arbitrage by a mutual friend who thought we should know each other. After our first interaction, I remember thinking, I like the way he thinks. When he invited me to an initial discovery session a couple of months later, we very easily shared conversation and hit on common values, passion points, and mutual interests. By the end of the hour, I knew without a doubt that this was the guy to guide my journey. Continue reading

Is Facebook Your Pleasure of Choice?

“Facebook is as pleasurable as food or sex” says the title of a recent Yahoo News article. Two neuroscientists researched and led this study and came to the conclusion that “‘self disclosure’ produces a response in the region of the brain associated with dopamine, a chemical associated with pleasure or the anticipation of a reward.”

Apparently, the reward that the brain receives after posting our thoughts and views on Facebook is very similar to the pleasure from food or sex. This is attributed to a less complex idea that we’re all familiar with. As humans, we love talking about ourselves. In fact, we spend about 30 to 40 percent of our speech disclosing our subjective views. Continue reading

Jeffrey Pfeffer: To Be a More Effective Relationship Broker, You Need New Friends

Jeffrey Pfeffer, Stanford University Professor and author of Power: Why Some People Have It and Others Don’t, is also the author of a popular business school case study based on myGreenlight founder Keith Ferrazzi. During his Social Capitalist interview, Professor Pfeffer explained the importance of becoming central in your network and taking on what he calls a brokerage role.

Brokers, even the literal term, bring people together. I mean, if you think about it, what is a venture capitalist? A venture capitalist links people with technology with people with money. And the people with money probably know other people with money. They don’t know people with technology and vice versa. So the broker fills this kind of structural hole and brings the two groups together.

That’s one of the things that effective networkers do. They find people who could benefit from being in contact with each other and put them in contact. And thereby, their sales profit from bringing those groups together. By the way, in order to do that, you have to do something that I think Keith really exemplifies and great networkers do, which is that you have to meet a diverse and broad set of people from a variety of industries and from a variety of walks of life. Continue reading

Relationship Roundup

Communication skills take center stage this week. Learn how to make virtual technology work for you, take control of your communication style, and direct it in a more purposeful and intentional way.

Emails that spark action – Here’s some advice and tips from CBS MoneyWatch contributor Dave Johnson for cutting through email clutter and eliciting the response you intended. Read Dave’s advice here: http://cbsn.ws/L0fydo.

Emotional intelligence – Do you have the heart for leadership? Explore the importance of your emotional capacity and your effectiveness as a leader in this Inc. article. Read it here: http://bit.ly/KYd8KN.

Clear up your communication – You can communicate all you want, but if no one understands you, you’re wasting time and money. This Inc. article offers a self-assessment checklist and tips for clearing up your communication clutter. Read more here: http://bit.ly/KK6o6G.

Communication alignment – Elevating your communication skills elevates your relationship building skills. One of the fundamentals of transmitting clarity to others is to clarify our nonverbal and verbal cues. Read the CBS MoneyWatch article here: http://cbsn.ws/M9Zxae.

Don’t be a virtual violator – With so much of our daily interaction happening via technology, the rules of engagement have changed. Mashable offers the latest business rules for communicating virtually. Read the article here: http://on.mash.to/KYerJE.

Kibibi Springs is myGreenlight’s Community Director.